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OurStory Scotland

... recording the stories of the LGBT community in Scotland

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Chaperone and Godmother

This is about my relationship with a younger man who, for the sake of the story, shall be called Paul. We became very fond of each other, and one day I said to him: 'oh, if only I was 20 years younger.' He replied: 'if only I was different.' I asked him what he meant, and it turned out he was gay. As far as I was concerned this was no problem: we should just continue with our friendship. He found it easy to talk to me about it, because we were very good friends and able to support each other.

Paul wanted to explore potential partners, and he asked me to help him by visiting gay bars in Glasgow with him and acting as a kind of chaperone. So we went together to the gay bars, and he was able to start learning about this new life that he wanted to explore.

Eventually this led to a relationship between Paul and another man. The other man was married and had 3 children. At this point we started to drift apart a bit, because Paul had his own interests. But we kept in touch, and I found Paul on his own one day with the three children of his friend. His friend was going off on the scene, and Paul was left looking after the three children. So I asked him: 'what's going on?' And he said: 'I don't know, I don't know why I'm doing this.' And that relationship ended.

But the story has a happy ending. Paul established a relationship with another guy, and last year they had their civil partnership, and I was the godmother at the ceremony.

Initially told in 'Love Out of Bounds' Performed on Valentine's Day
2010 Jose 2011 Jose

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